Boogie Chillen
June 30, 2003

TAN: MY GOD! Have you seen the latest Epil-Stop commercial? How long has it BEEN since that woman has shaved under her arms? I'm guessing about 5 years! She should carefully cut them off and sell them on eBay as wigmaking supplies!

Mia to Aidan: "It's so SMALL! Where should I put it?" She might want to save that line for CandyAss.

I KNOW what he really SAID, but did anyone else think that Aidan looked at his watch and then said: "It's almost time for my shit at the Valley Inn Bar"? Uh, I don't think those peanuts are covered in CHOCOLATE.

Laceys is supposed to be a BIG department store. Why, then is the PRIME cosmetic counter about as big as a half-built lemonade stand? I've seen baby CRIBS bigger than that!

It's supposed to be a scorching afternoon in PV. Why, then, is Joni sitting in the never-to-be-finished Habitat For Humanity house with crickets chirping?

Greenlee tells Carlos that she wants to make love to him. She says it with all the passion one would expect of a person about to eat brussels sprouts because she knows they will be good for her body, despite their vile taste and unfortunate tendency to create eye- watering flatulence.

Continuing in my toilet humor that seems to be my main theme today, I think I finally figured out one of the reasons why CandyAss's incredibly blase' attitude toward virtually EVERYTHING (acting as if EVERY LITTLE THING is a tremendously mundane chore that's really beneath his dignity) bugs the shit out of me (so to speak) -- QUITE often when he delivers or is about to deliver what he considers to be a droll comment, he makes a sound that seems to be a combination of clearing his throat and bearing down to take a mild shit. I'm SERIOUS! Listen to him when he sits down for a drink at the VI Bar. Aidan says: "The usual?" CandyAss says "Yeah", then sits down and grunts just before making a snide comment about Mary who just walked in. He should join Aidan behind the bar (see previous paragraph about Aidan's exceptionally regular schedule) -- with a newspaper.

Robin "he's certainly EARNED the name 'shithead'" Coutellier