Boogie Chillen
June 7-8, 2001

Wow, not one, but TWO tiny coughs from the pneumonia-stricken, heartbroken Laura. I'm impressed -- NOT! And there are TWO more! But she's cured now. Didn't they just find out the night before? Ah, modern meds!

Dr. Joe says that if Laura were to stay in the hospital, there would be no argument but that she was getting the proper kind of treatment. HAH! How many of you just about lost your lunch over THAT assertion?

Dimitri lunges at Gabriel and yanks him away from the kids, screaming at the top of his lungs for Gabriel to stay away from his brother's kids. I'm sure THAT didn't disturb the kids in the slightest. Actually, it probably DIDN'T, considering that's how Dimitri acts when he sees a spider, too.

If anyone sprayed perfume on me without my permission (which they would NEVER, EVER get), they would be facing a SERIOUS lawsuit. When Greenlee was spritzing everyone with perfume (and never bothered to say what the perfume was or where to get it), why didn't weren't there any catty remarks or looks from the women? They all seemed thrilled to be getting spritzed by this nearly naked woman in the mall and appeared not to even notice anything but the general crowd approval of the scent.

I think one word aptly describes J.R.'s "friends": MUTANTS. Man that's sorry-ass acting. These guys are so old they probably have mortgages, and their portrayal of rebel teens is PATHETIC!

Ya know, if tomorrow's PV Bulletin has an article about a massacre at Wildwind, it would not be surprising. "The alleged axe-wielder, Gabriel Devane, looked wild-eyed and jutted his lower lip to an extreme degree as he continued to mutter 'They wouldn't shut up, they wouldn't shut up, they wouldn't SHUT UP!!!!' Devane was unkempt and smelled like he hadn't bathed in 6 months except for a slight sea-tang, not to mention the aroma of horse manure and dog slobber. While his clothes were drenched with fresh blood, ominous, weeks-old blood was also evident on his pant legs. And he had fleas. He is being held in Oakhaven's Criminal Ward for observation. Meanwhile, an onlooker in the crowd outside Wildwind was heard to say 'Gabriel? I could have sworn DIMITRI was going to be the one to totally flip out and slaughter everyone!' Another curious person countered 'NO WAY, man! I had $50 on EDMUND doing it!' A security guard who wished to remain anonymous said: 'Them English broads were pretty spooky. That one who wears shawls all the time could FREEZE everyone to death just by LOOKING at them. That other one, well, all she would have to do is stumble over an ottoman while carrying an axe and it would be all over for everyone. She was kind of klutzy.'"

Robin "klutzy-squared" Coutellier